Except when this happened. Which it did four or five times during the afternoon:
Old friend of the family: So what are you doing these days, Jane?"
Me: Well, not very much really-
OFOTF: Oooooooh, sounds very nice!
Stop. Please, please. For the love of double choc chip, rewind your mouth and engage your brain.
You know I'm 45. You can see I'm three times the size I used to be. You know I have no children. I'm not dripping diamonds. You know I used to have an adrenaline-heavy job and be very active. You can see I am limping, and sitting down with my head supported whenever possible. And most of you have heard from my parents at least once that I have ME.
What do you think is, actually, the likelihood that my reason for answering 'not very much' is going to be because of something 'very nice'?
Yeah.
Also - when you fail to recognise me because I'm now so fat, then pretend the failure was due to my having got a new haircut? It's kind of you, but no one is fooled. At least now I'm 45 you have all stopped asking when the baby is due, though. Let's count that as progress.
I sympathise. I went to working part time because I care for my disabled elderly mum and even people who have seen me pushing her around in a wheelchair say "How lovely to work part time, it must be great to have so much time to do what you want - or do you get bored?" They don't seem to realise that being a carer is a 24-hours-a-day, seven-days-a-week, 365-days-a-year job in itself!
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